Friday, July 29, 2011

Gifts

This summer I had the gift of time alone
My Mum & Daughter away on the road
It gave me time to uncurl, find myself

It was time to head to LA to meet up
I was ready, I missed them

Then I get the phone call, “There was an accident”

You are never prepared for those emotions
They are alive ~relief
They’re hurt ~panic
I’m not there ~frustration, helplessness
A friend can get my daughter ~grateful

The emotions all circle, running over the top of each other

On a plane, took too long!

I see her, my daughter, she is really here! So much joy

Hospital ~fear
Nurses ~wonderful
Mother ~bruised and swollen almost beyond recognition

Uhaul, rent truck
Wrecking yard, see our van. It’s toast

Salvage. Miracles. Surprises. Sadness
Thank you and farewell to Mathilda the Van

Waiting for improvement and answers
Mum unable to leave hospital
Days blur with insurance, trooper & other calls
Sorting the van, what’s garbage

Finally released from hospital, back to the house
I can plan to drive back to Oakland now

2 days to travel, stretch it out stopping lots
Easier for my daughter, trauma

Home, relief, work, catch up, figure out, keep going
BREAK… I needed a break, Potter & couch

Better, back on it, sort, papers, stuff
Mum home tomorrow, I get her at SFO
How will I keep her from over doing?
Challenges galore will be coming my way.

I will need to take moments for myself along the way.
Writing is good, reading is good

Reminding myself how grateful I am is key.

I enjoyed my alone time over the summer,
but I would never want it to be permanent

I love my girls, and I feel lucky…

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Alone

I am not used to the freedom that comes with being alone
Missing my child, feeling strange
Waiting for contact…

Enjoying only speaking when I wish to
Singing to my choice of music
Watching what I like

Taking moments for myself, unhindered

Wishing for hugs

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Bringing home our friends

So as we empty our storage,
Books, treasures & friends appear…

Our floor is littered with furry bodies of all sizes
Friends of old, each bearing their own stories.

Whom to keep, how to decide.

Heart break for sure.

Snuggling down with them all, heaven.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Simple Pleasures

The funny little things can make all the difference
I know this, yet still I am surprised

A friend’s success
A dvr that works
A teenage daughter happy to borrow my clothes

I wonder what joys will touch my life tomorrow
Will you be a part of them?

Monday, October 11, 2010

...and the rain falls

some times life can get you down
seems like you're being held under water
washed away in the crowd
choices just out of reach
hoping that the next day will bring changes
then you stop and breathe
you lift your head & set your shoulders back
finding the courage to take that next step
it is a beginning to returning to yourself